Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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