Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
