Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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