David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Randomize
