I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
