everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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