I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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