I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
