I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Randomize
