she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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