You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
