He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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