im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
