I feel great
I just peed on a car
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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