i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
