I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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