I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize
