Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
