Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Just high enough for therapy.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize