I showed him my bush... on skype.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
