Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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