i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize