Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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