Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
