We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Randomize
