Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
