Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Pants are for mortals
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