In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I believe in your delicious
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
