I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
God I need to hump something, right now.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
