How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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