I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
