i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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