I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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