Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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