We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
