Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
