I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
