dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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