Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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