you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
