i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Farmville is her only friend.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
