what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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