Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
