This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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