She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
