This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
