I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
and she was petting her beer can
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Randomize
