Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
