That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
