So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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