I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
