just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize